A Journey to the Way We Were

I'm so excited coz in a few hours my hubby and I will be celebrating our 5th anniversary. Tomorrow will be a special day for us as we go back to the places we visited a few years after our graduation. Most of all this one very special place where we officially became a couple -- while sipping our favorite frappe.

A few weeks ago I was browsing through my files and came upon my saved collection of Friendster blogs which I like to share with you as we revisit the days when we were just starting to enter into the best thing that ever happened to us.

Happy 5^th Anniversary Honey – Hao Ma!! As I said before… Let’s stay together, forever. I love you so much!!

(1)  He's Somewhere Out There   2007/01/20

As I start the year I begin to think --- its 2007, I’m already 26 and time really flies fast. I start making plans... For myself… but somehow can't manage to come up with long term plans as I used to. I begin to worry--most of the time think of the future. I don’t want to grow old alone and stay here. I used to foresee my future as a happy and rewarding one--of course with my own family by that time.

 

My friends who know me best are asking -- when are you going to have your special someone? I guess they know it really takes a long time for me to get over a break up and enter into another relationship coz it’s been like that ever since. The last time took 3 years. But not because I’m not yet over my ex… I guess it's because when I’m ok I tend to enjoy life more---alone---but with my friends of course**u know what I mean by alone. I become choosy in a way. I easily lose interest in someone I thought I like especially when I sense he's not that interested anyway. I’m not really sure what I’m looking for in a person. But one thing's for sure -- no matter how long it takes, I believe there's someone out there for me... my better half **future better half, shall I say. Maybe our paths haven't crossed yet, or maybe he's someone I already know. But one day when the right time comes... we both will know and realize >>> YOU'RE THE ONE FOR ME… THE ONE I WAITED FOR, FOR A LONG TIME. Now isn’t that the nicest thing that could happen to someone? And that's definitely worth waiting for.

 

>>>In the end it won't matter anymore how long you've waited, how painful life has been--- It will be worth everything. When you find your happiness all will make sense. You'll see the fruit of your labor. You'll never know how it feels to be truly happy unless you experience pain. And you'll just remember all the bad things that happened and realize you've been thru the worst and you survived.

(2)  To Wherever He Will Lead Me   2007/03/08

Many people make many different plans for their future -- how to spend the years to come and who to spend them with. I used to be one of them. Not that I'm saying I don't have plans anymore but after spending many years of setting my mind to something and almost living it, it just came to a point where I suddenly woke up and found myself stranded---in an isolated place where no one can reach me. After the trials I just had to fight then realized I've been thru the worst--thru the lowest point of my life… and I survived!! Now I have everything (**almost) =)... But one thing's for sure. I know I'm stronger... been thru many trials… experienced a roller coaster of emotional turmoil but managed to surpass them.

Now I'm in the stage of my life where I'm still finding myself. My happiness maybe. Serenity --- I used to pray for my dreams and plans to come to reality but now I pray for Him to guide me---to wherever He will lead me--- now I can say it's up to You. My decisions are not my own anymore but Yours. I still believe in my destiny and now I can fulfill it though I don't exactly know what it is yet. I thank Him for the trials that made me stronger and a better person. Each day I learn to appreciate the things and people I used to take for granted. He gave me a new beginning. Many years have been wasted but still... As the saying goes -- Better Late Than Never.

(3)  -= the ‘one’ for me =-   2007/04/06

Nothing feels more fulfilling than finding your one true love amongst all the people in this crazy world we live in. I spent my life trying to look for him and realizing in the end I made a mistake, falling for the wrong persons. Just when I'm about to give up... there he was... I found him at last!! Now I'm complete. My life couldn't get any better. I found the one person for me---my destiny--- early yet to say but I've never been this sure about anything. All the pain, trouble and tears I experienced before are worth the wait and if I had to go through the worst again to get to where I am now, I would. He's my 'perfect' better half and this by far is the happiest I've ever been. I couldn't ask for anything more... I love you honey… Stay with me forever


 

(4)  I found him at last 2007/05/18

This year started good for me. Before 2006 ended around October, I came to many realizations after getting thru a lot in the past months. Trying to find myself, looking for answers, feeling alone despite many people around me... Then I started praying for my destiny. I start to ask Him--Is there really someone out there for me? Or I’m "doomed" --to live my life either being alone or waiting for someone who already belongs to someone else like I used to do many times before. After a few weeks a big sign came right in front of me... At first I didn’t take it seriously and thought it was just a coincidence but after a few more weeks I started dreaming of someone -- someone I already know from my college days --- a very good friend whom I haven’t heard from for a few years. Again I didn’t want to take it seriously but the dreams came so regularly so I thought, these are not just coincidences, these are definitely SIGNS!

So I started looking for him. At first there was a bit of hesitation coz there were so many questions bothering me like what if he doesn't want to talk to me anymore or he's already committed to someone or we were really meant to be just friends...things like that...but I thought it's worth the risk... he's worth the risk... and if there was someone I could trust it's definitely him. Knowing him for many years now, he's a good person (as I remember). He never made me feel bad. He was the one person who has always been there to cheer me up, looking after me from a distance. Then after asking around (asking almost everyone possible) just to find him… After almost losing hope coz he's nowhere to be found, as if he literally disappeared, I found him at last!! Here in Friendster... hehe. A lot of 'kamustahan' came. I was so surprised to find out he's working in China (at that time I thought, this can’t be, wala na talaga, I’M DOOMED!!!)... But then DESTINY found its way... NAKS!!  Just last month he came home for a few days vacation... we met... then there was magic!! --- DEFINITELY MAGIC!

Now I'm complete. He completed my life. Now we take things one step at a time, making plans, trying to make China and Philippines as near to each other as possible =)  I never thought this is possible, we never did... but what can I say--DESTINY WILL REALLY FIND ITS WAY NO MATTER WHERE YOU ARE OR HOW LONG IT TAKES.

(5)  TEN YEARS AFTER 2007/06/01

 

1997... Section B118 - SW403 - MIT IE 1st year block section... It was the first day of school that he claims when he saw me sitting in front of the classroom. He was among the pinakamagulong boys sitting at the back making fun of our profs and classmates laughing at almost anything possible (yes, that's definitely him!!) We became friends talk for hours over the phone, then we parted ways almost 3 years ago. I dreamt of him (almost every day late last year) and I decided to search for him. Surprisingly he's in China!! But love came through (wink)… Whoever thought after ten years we'll be a couple? A "perfect match" most people say. He says he's lucky but I think it's the other way around. I never thought I'd be lucky enough to have someone as 'perfect' as him (perfect na sana manginginom lang… joke lang**pero half-meant** sigh)

So why after ten years? Why only now? We've been asking the same question over and over (but it feels so good - the thought of the one for you is someone you already know many, many years ago) After coming across many signs then later on realizing he's someone I would wanna keep for the rest of my life (how I wish), then searching for him almost anywhere possible (while at the back of my mind ang tanga tanga ko dati nandito lang sya palagi), I’ve proven he's really my destiny.. THIS IS IT!!! I LOVE HIM. .. I REALLY DO. I love him with every inch of my being... from the smallest thing he does to the biggest... no doubt... I love him.. Coz he loves me with all his heart  (feeling!! =) ) he makes me laugh, he's caring, sweet, overprotective, paranoid (na rin gaya ko), smart, good looking, tall, understanding, full of life, optimistic, responsible and not to mention patient (ten years ba naman) There's no reason for me not to fall for him. Ever since he's always been there watching over me... I do believe he did love me ten years ago, he still does now, and he always will. He's someone I want to grow old with and have a family with… someone I could trust... who will take care of me. I feel safe when I’m with him. His love is more than enough for me. God lead me to him - my missing piece - and our feelings will stay this way ten years after and for the rest of our days...

(6)  -I LOVE YOU-   2007/08/19

i love the way you smile... the way you laugh

the feeling of your hand against mine

my head against your shoulder

the way you stare at me as if you're looking through my soul

the feeling of security when im with you

i love it when we kiss.. when we hug

i love the thought of you silently loving me since college

i love watching you sleep like a baby

i love it when we talk about anything & everything til we fall asleep

i love the moments we share when we laugh at the simplest things

i love the feeling when you're being insecure coz it shows how much i mean to you

i love your face, your height, your eyes, your built, the way you dress up

i love the thought of us growing old together

needless to say... i love everything about you. Now i know you're my missing half coz you're the only one who made me felt this way. I know my heart's finally in the right place. I love you now and I will love you for the rest of my life.

Reminiscing my Preggy Days

Time really flies so fast and today our little baby is already two years old. I still remember the days when he was still in my womb. I have so many memories which I like to share with you; most of them were the challenging ones.

-= When we Got the News =-

It was August, 2009 when we learned I was pregnant. It was a mixture of every bit of feeling coz we were in the midst of taking care of all the preparations for the big day (church wedding) set in December. I had so many doubts that time. I wasn’t sure I’m ready to have a baby yet. The exact day I took the pregnancy test, my hubby (fiancé that time) was promoted… which we took as a very positive sign. We thought immediately – this baby would bring us good luck. =)  

-= During the 1^st Trimester =-

My early pregnancy signs were – spotting which lasted for two days, dizziness (kind of the feeling when riding a bus, or any vehicle where the driver hits on the brakes every now and then), frequent urinating, very strong sense of smell (I was irritated in the smell of garlic and some perfume)… well those are some. Big no-no’s were coffee, iced tea and dark soft drinks / soda, smoking and alcohol, high heels, make-up (I had to switch to mineral foundation), salty and sweet food, going to the parlor (haircut is ok but any treatments that use chemicals weren’t allowed). One of the hardest things I had to do was to drink 8 to 12 glasses (2 liters) of water every day. I never got used to drinking enough water. My OB gyne saw that the amniotic fluid (water inside the womb that surrounds and protects the baby) was not sufficient and I also had urinary tract infection since my body didn’t get enough fluid (when I had U.T.I., I always had fever, thanks to biogesic, it’s the only OB recommended OTC drug I can take). During this period I had spotting at times too so my OB suggested a few weeks bed rest. I had to take 2 types of medicines for weeks and suppository for a few days so I could flush out the one-inched blood clot seen in the ultrasound. During my 3rd month, we also visited the hospitals where my OB was accredited… checked the room we were expecting to get, the facilities and of course compute the expected finances that would go with the soon to be delivery (this is very important so that you know what to expect).

-= 2^nd Trimester =-

Luckily this period was almost no hassle at all. My hubby was so mindful of what I ate and we really watched me and my baby’s weight so I can have a normal delivery. I ate mostly fish, vegetables and fruits. Very less and almost no salty food and sweets (but I sneak out eating halo halo and chocolates sometimes…hehe). I cut my rice intake since I immediately felt full every meal. Of course, I had to take enough water daily and fresh buco juice too to avoid having U.T.I. again and they say it also helps in cleaning the baby inside the womb. By the way this was the time my hubby and I got married in the far south… a very happy moment (I remember feeling our baby kicking when we were in front of the altar) =)

-= 3^rd trimester and Giving Birth =- 

Well, this was the most challenging stage. By this time we had to prepare ourselves for the delivery and the sleepless nights to follow. We already prepared the baby bag (this includes everything that baby needs when in the hospital for delivery like clothes, diapers, baby blanket, feeding bottle and formula milk **this is a MUST to all soon to be moms so when that moment comes, you’re all set to rush to the hospital with the baby bag to go. On my 7^th month I did regular walks in the morning and late afternoon, usually after office, in preparation for the delivery. Later on my check-ups were on a weekly basis. Unfortunately during my last month of pregnancy, I again had U.T.I. so I had to take a high dosage of medicine. I had to be treated before giving birth so our baby won’t get it as well coz if he does, he also needs to be treated (imagine that little infant taking meds? – usually through injection!). 

Two days before giving birth while having dinner, I got those stomach aches. I couldn’t move for about a minute because of the pain and this went on until the following morning every 5 hours at least. So we went to the OB the day after and I was advised to take a rest since I’ll be giving birth within the week. After a few hours I had a few reddish discharges and so after a few hours again we already went to the hospital. In my I.E., it was then only 1 cm but my OB instructed the hospital staff to admit me already. My labor was induced--every 30 mins., 15 mins., 10, 5, 2, and later on every 30 seconds until it was fully dilated. It was a painful 15 hours of labor and I remember there was a time I asked my hubby for a C-section instead coz I can’t take the pain anymore. When I was ready to give birth, 2 men had to assist me so the anesthesiologist can inject the epidural somewhere in my spine. When I was in the delivery room, my OB didn’t have a hard time at all. The epidural immediately took effect which was a very big relief after those 15 long hours.  She had 2 assistants and they were chatting about something else (luckily, this took my mind off the pain). It only took me about 3-5 pushes before our little angel came out. And there he was… crying. It was a very moving experience which I really can’t put into words. The doctor handed him over to me and I called him out and said – BABY!! – and he tried to look at me. 

Those were the days and the experiences that go with it. Most of what I had gone through were not easy. But being a mother and seeing my little boy smiling, laughing, running, even shouting... every little thing he does is a miracle. Having him was not at all easy from the start but I’m lucky that I have my hubby, our loved ones and of course our Creator beside us to help and guide us along the way... and having a family of my own is a miracle in every way, every day.

Happy 2^nd birthday to you, our Chinky Winky!!! You are and will always be our little angel… Mommy and Daddy love you very much!!!